3 Tools Every Father Should Know How to Use

“And suddenly a voice came from heaven, saying, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”  Matthew 3:17

 I.  Acknowledgement   –  “This is MY beloved Son”

The Father identified his son.

Your own child needs to hear:

  • You are my child.
  • You are wanted.
  • You have great potential.

By acknowledging you are encouraging!

II.  Affection  –  “This is my BELOVED Son”

The Father declared his love for his son.

Your own child should never have reason to doubt your love.

  • Tell them you love them.
  • Demonstrate your love.   Merely loving our children is not enough!
  • Expressing your love strengthens your bond.
  • Guard against confusing “love” with “approval.”

“When “love” and “approval” become confused, love loses its identity.  The pleasant feeling associated with approval is mistaken for love.  To be disapproved leaves you feeling unloved.”

III.  Affirmation  –  “in whom I am well pleased.”

The Father spoke of his pleasure in his son.

Affirm your children and watch them soar!

  • Tell your child that you are pleased with them.  NOT the same as your love for them!
  • Tell your child what about them pleases you.
  • Pray over them.  Thank God for them!
  • Speak positively of them to others.

 

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Let’s Take Care of Each Other!

Mr. Christmas

JesusAndChildren

 

 

 

 

 

 

Mr. Christmas

With a chuckle in his tummy
And a smile upon his face,
He pulled them to his knee
‘Sat them gently into place.

He spoke to them of happiness
And joys too much to tell.
He laughed at wide-eyed innocence,
And voices clear as bells.

He spoke to them of coming
On a very special day,
And answered whispered questions like,
“You’re sure you know the way?”

That He loves little children,
For all it’s plain to see.
It is written in His Word,
“Let them come to Me.”

Maston E. Jackson
1992  © All Rights Reserved

Train Up Your Child

Kids on the floor

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”     Proverbs 22:6

The question that plagues most parents is this:  How do I accomplish this?

I.  Expose Them to the Word of God

“And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.  You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.  You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”    Deuteronomy 6:6-9

Be Their Teacher

    1. Live it before them.
    2. Teach it to them.
    3. Talk about it.
    4. Honor it.

II.  Exhort Them As They Follow God

“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”                    Ephesians 6:4

Be their guide.  (Guide them to walk with God)

      1. Early on, your interests will become their interests.
      2. They will tend to gravitate toward what you approve.
      3. Explore their weaknesses and their victories with them.
          • What went right?
          • What went wrong?
          • How can I adjust?

Be their coach.

      1. Encourage them as they hit rough spots.
      2. Cheer them on!
      3. Celebrate their wins!

III.  Express the Father’s Love for Them

Learn what makes them feel loved.    “The 5 Love Languages”  Dr. Gary Chapman

      1. Words of Affirmation
      2. Acts of Service
      3. Receiving Gifts
      4. Quality Time
      5. Physical Touch

Your love relationship with them will color their view of God.

Your words, actions, and attitude can inspire confidence or doubt in God.

Love their soul.

      1. You have influence over an eternal soul that is not your own.
      2. Make sure that you represent God well.
      3. Instruct them truthfully and completely.
      4. Teach them the personal discipline necessary to finish this life well.

Avoid provocation.  It is a spirit breaker.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”    Colossians  3:21

“7 Ways Fathers Provoke Their Children”    Mark Driscoll

      1. Make More Withdrawals Than Deposits
      2. Resort to Physical or Verbal Abuse
      3. Be Emotionally Absent
      4. Publicly Humiliate and Criticize
      5. Be No Fun
      6. Don’t Be Generous
      7. Never Say “I’m Sorry”

Are you intentionally training your child to walk with God or discouraging them with your own selfish attitude?