3 Tools Every Father Should Know How to Use

June 7, 2018 by 2 Comments

“And suddenly a voice came from heaven, saying, “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.”  Matthew 3:17

 I.  Acknowledgement   –  “This is MY beloved Son”

The Father identified his son.

Your own child needs to hear:

  • You are my child.
  • You are wanted.
  • You have great potential.

By acknowledging you are encouraging!

II.  Affection  –  “This is my BELOVED Son”

The Father declared his love for his son.

Your own child should never have reason to doubt your love.

  • Tell them you love them.
  • Demonstrate your love.   Merely loving our children is not enough!
  • Expressing your love strengthens your bond.
  • Guard against confusing “love” with “approval.”

“When “love” and “approval” become confused, love loses its identity.  The pleasant feeling associated with approval is mistaken for love.  To be disapproved leaves you feeling unloved.”

III.  Affirmation  –  “in whom I am well pleased.”

The Father spoke of his pleasure in his son.

Affirm your children and watch them soar!

  • Tell your child that you are pleased with them.  NOT the same as your love for them!
  • Tell your child what about them pleases you.
  • Pray over them.  Thank God for them!
  • Speak positively of them to others.

 

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Train Up Your Child

July 8, 2013 by Leave a Comment

Kids on the floor

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.”     Proverbs 22:6

The question that plagues most parents is this:  How do I accomplish this?

I.  Expose Them to the Word of God

“And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.  You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes.  You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”    Deuteronomy 6:6-9

Be Their Teacher

    1. Live it before them.
    2. Teach it to them.
    3. Talk about it.
    4. Honor it.

II.  Exhort Them As They Follow God

“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”                    Ephesians 6:4

Be their guide.  (Guide them to walk with God)

      1. Early on, your interests will become their interests.
      2. They will tend to gravitate toward what you approve.
      3. Explore their weaknesses and their victories with them.
          • What went right?
          • What went wrong?
          • How can I adjust?

Be their coach.

      1. Encourage them as they hit rough spots.
      2. Cheer them on!
      3. Celebrate their wins!

III.  Express the Father’s Love for Them

Learn what makes them feel loved.    “The 5 Love Languages”  Dr. Gary Chapman

      1. Words of Affirmation
      2. Acts of Service
      3. Receiving Gifts
      4. Quality Time
      5. Physical Touch

Your love relationship with them will color their view of God.

Your words, actions, and attitude can inspire confidence or doubt in God.

Love their soul.

      1. You have influence over an eternal soul that is not your own.
      2. Make sure that you represent God well.
      3. Instruct them truthfully and completely.
      4. Teach them the personal discipline necessary to finish this life well.

Avoid provocation.  It is a spirit breaker.

“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.”    Colossians  3:21

“7 Ways Fathers Provoke Their Children”    Mark Driscoll

      1. Make More Withdrawals Than Deposits
      2. Resort to Physical or Verbal Abuse
      3. Be Emotionally Absent
      4. Publicly Humiliate and Criticize
      5. Be No Fun
      6. Don’t Be Generous
      7. Never Say “I’m Sorry”

Are you intentionally training your child to walk with God or discouraging them with your own selfish attitude?

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4 Things to Remember When Fishing Seems Useless

July 15, 2011 by Leave a Comment
“When He had stopped speaking, He said to Simon, “Launch out into the deep and let down your nets for a catch.”  But Simon answered and said to Him, “Master, we have toiled all night and caught nothing; nevertheless at your word I will let down the net.”  And when they had done this, they caught a great number of fish, and their net was breaking.”            Luke 5:4-6  NKJV

(The term “fishing” is to be understood in this outline as a metaphor for “intentional evangelism” as indicated in Luke 5:10)

I.      Jesus Still Intends for Us to Fish!

    • His plan has never changed. 
    • His purpose has never changed.
    • His passion has never change.

II.   Lack of Results is No Reason to Quit!

    • The fish are not all dead. (Its not too late)
    • The fish still have the same nature.  (Sin is still the problem)
    • The fish are still catchable.

III.  Fish Because He Said So!

    • Your attitude toward fishing largely determines whether you will fish, not the size of the catch.
    • His word is more important than our ability.
    • Our obedience is the key.

IV.   You Cannot Predict What May Happen!

    • Where yesterday there was nothing, today may be a net full.
    • Where yesterday a friend was hardened, today he may be broken.
    • Today you may be the only Believer in your circle of influence.  Tomorrow God may use you to take an unimaginable catch!

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Why Adultery is Just Plain Stupid

June 24, 2011 by Leave a Comment
“Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; he who does so destroys his own soul.  Wounds and dishonor he will get, and his reproach will not be wiped away.  For jealousy is a husband’s fury; therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.  He will accept no recompense, nor will he be appeased though you give him many gifts.”                                                                                                                                                                    Psalm 6:32-35 NKJV

1.  You and those you love will pay a high price.

  • An expensive moment in history is recorded.
  • Someone knows.
  • Someone will remember for years to come.
  • Someone will relate what they have heard.
  • Someone you love dearly will be crushed by what is told.
  • You cannot escape what is known of you.

2.  Your ability to be trusted is called into question.

What does infidelity say about your ability to keep your word?  There is no need to get mad when someone cites infidelity as the reason they do not trust you.  It is not their fault that you have not kept your promises.
“Physical infidelity is the signal, the notice given, that all fidelities are undermined.”
Katherine Anne Porter

  • The value of trust appraises highest once it has been sold.
  • How much is the ability to be trusted worth to you?

3.  The betrayed mate just put a target on your back.

Do I really have to explain this?

4.  God loves both parties who have just wounded the other.

  • A woman has just damaged the man whom God created for greatness.
  • A man has just violated the precious daughter of the Most High God.
Before you commit adultery, tell God that it will be okay, just this once.  Remember your words, they will be repeated for you when you stand before Him.

“But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment.”                                                                       Matthew 12:36 NKJV

 


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Who Is Sharpening Whom?

June 16, 2011 by Leave a Comment
“As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.”                                                                                                                   Proverbs 27:17 NKJV

Take a moment and jot down the names of your top three friends.

Some questions to ask about your friends:

1. Why have I chosen them as my friend(s)?

What is it that draws us together?
What element(s) do we have most in common?
Why do I really “like” them?

2. How do they sharpen me?

Do they sharpen my walk with Christ?
Do they sharpen my spiritual senses?
Do they evoke fleshly responses from me?

3. What effect do I have upon them?

Are they better having known you?
Can you tell if they walk closer to Christ than when you met?
Do your conversations reflect the grace of God?

4. Have I cultivated our friendship in a way that honors God?

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